I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
is wine microwaveable?
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
