I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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