I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Randomize
