did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Randomize