Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
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