sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize