just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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