Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
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