PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Randomize