it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
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