I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
