Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
