it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Randomize