garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
