I feel great
I just peed on a car
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
