I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
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she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
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I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
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