Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
