____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
