is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
