i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
