watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
I wear drunk well.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
