like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
