yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
