Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
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