If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
But break dance skills will only take you so far
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Randomize
