Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
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So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
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I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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