That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
