she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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