these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize
