omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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