I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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