She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I feel like abortions should bother me more
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
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