Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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