yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
