She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
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