also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
