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• (480): View more from Arizona

  I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground

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• (207): View more from Maine

  i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.

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• (631): View more from New York

  I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.

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• (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.

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• (651): View more from Minnesota

  You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?

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• (910): View more from North Carolina

  Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now

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• (512): View more from Texas

  things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"

  (210): View more from Texas

  I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...

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• (904): View more from Florida

  There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.

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• (651): View more from Minnesota

  We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.

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• (740): View more from Ohio

  MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3

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• (906): View more from Michigan

  You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son

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