Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
