so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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