New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
false alarm, still single
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
