That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize
