none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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