so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Shitshow foam night was such a success
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
