I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
and she was petting her beer can
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize
