He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
