Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
