oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
