Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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