So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
