I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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